Wednesday, April 28, 2010


"4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8Love never fails."
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Love Checklist towards a person:

1: Am I patient with that person?
2: Am I kind to that person?
3: Am I envious of what (s)he has?
4: Do I boast of what I have?
5: Am I proud?
6: Am I rude to him/her?
7: Am I lifting myself up and not him/her?
8: Do I easily get angered with him/her?
9: Do I remember everything (s)he did wrong?
10: Am I happy when something bad happens to them?
11: Do I try to protect him/her?
12: Do I trust them?
13: Do I have high hopes for them?
14: Do I keep trying even when our relationship gets rough?
15: Do I give up on him/her?

Thursday, April 22, 2010


Last night was amazing and as they had fore-warned, utterly powerful. The session was about the open question, "Why did Jesus Die?" Pastor Tom displayed an awe-inspiring message that gripped many people by the heart. I love especially the figure he presented and how even though Jesus gave us a bridge to cross the Great Divide, it is still up to us to choose whether to walk across it or reject God entirely and stay where it "seems" comfortable. One of the things that most affected me was the story of Jesus's last words on the cross. "My God! My God! Why have you forsaken me?" Ever since I can remember I always wondered why He said that. It didn't make sense to me. I had in my mind that God never forsake Jesus! I'll bet He was right there with him. Why would He have forsaken him? Wouldn't Jesus being without sin have known that? But now it all make complete and perfect sense. On that cross, Jesus, being completely perfect and sinless, chose to die the most brutal death in history, a crucifixion, so that we the sinners would not have to die for our sins. It's clearly stated in the Bible, "The wages of sin is death" (Romans 8:23) The truth is, even if we had never sinned except one little lie, we still deserved to die. We deserved to be on that cross, not Jesus. When he was up there, Jesus created a perfect spotless lamb, himself, as the sacrifice for our sins. He took all of the whole population's sin on his own shoulders that day. Because of this tremendous act of Mercy, God, Jesus's daddy, was up there in Heaven and had to look away at His own son because now he had "sin", OUR sin. God is so holy and pure that He can not look at sin or even be near it. So He had to look away even at His son's most crucial and trying time in his life. Talk about rejection. Rejection from fellow humans is well hardly nothing compared to the rejection of God. No wonder Jesus cried out, "My God! My God! Why have your forsaken me!" It breaks my heart. I could never imagine. I admit that I wished Jesus didn't die for us, we don't deserve this Love and Mercy He provides. It's hard to think of someone you love so much dying in your place, but not just dying, completely tortured beyond recognition. I can't imagine being in God's place and seeing my own son brutally murdered by the ones He came down to save. Love, Love. If you've ever wondered what love looked like. THAT, is it. You know what free's me? Now that the sin in our lives have been taken care of, God doesn't look at us anymore as sinners. He see's us as daughters and sons, perfect, bought and paid for, forgiven and free'd. He doesn't look at the sin that we constantly make. It helps so much that He doesn't dwell on my sin, but He forgives it and throws it out the back window and forgets it. He now only see's who we are and who we are meant to be, and not who we were and what we've done. I feel so.... valuable.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Redeeming Love

I am enthralled by this book, "Redeeming Love" by Francine Rivers. Completely enthralled. I'm awake enough to tell you that I went to bed at 5:30AM because of reading this book with my alarm going off at 6:30AM. Oddly enough even though I've chosen to allow myself only an hour of sleep, I feel quite alert. Although caffeine does absolutely nothing for me, I've chosen to grab a 20 ounce espresso from Super America to help.

If you've read the story of Hosea, you'd know the basic plot/influence behind the story in "Redeeming Love." The book begins with a story of a young 8 year old girl and how her horrible life started out. She was told blatantly from her own father's mouth that he never wanted her and had wished she'd never been born. There's more but I'll leave that to the imagination or until your curiosity becomes so strong you begin reading this book yourself. She becomes one of the main characters in the story as an adult. Needless to say she was sold to prostitution at age 8, and the book show's how this young 23ish year old woman, who's heart has become like stone due to years of abuse gets shown redeeming love by this man, but ultimately by God.

I am about half-way into it right now and would love nothing more than to go back home and read the rest of the book. This book has shown me an immeasurable amount of revelations ranging from mild to grand. I highly recommend it and I haven't even finished it.

I think one of the main things that stick out to me is the thoughts that this woman has, they are deathly accurate to what a lot of woman view of themselves and towards others. I know I've noticed similarities. It makes me see the need that woman today have, One of the bigger ones is the need to feel accepted and not judged by what they have done. This woman has been placed in a "category" all her life, and that is all most people viewed her as. The prostitute, the unwanted, the unloved, the undeserving. It's wrong, in actuality all she needs is love, unconditional love given by the Father, the only kind of love that can replace her completely shattered heart with a new one. A love given so graciously and abundantly that we can pass on this love to others. They don't need rejection, or your judgments, they need someone who can show them what true love is.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Fickle Feelings

It never ceases to amaze me how one moment, I feel like I am completely on fire for God, and then the next minute it seems like a game on my iPod seems more appetizing then reading a chapter in my bible.  This past month has been a whirlwind of events that have proven to me beyond measure that God is here and he's doing a major renovation inside of me! I can feel it, and people can see it.  So why is it that after all that God has done for me, I seem to still lose interest a little bit more each day? Well. I'm not going to allow it.  Regardless of how fickle my feelings are, I choose to worship the one true God.  I choose to be in a constant relationship with Him.  He deserves so much and my time is only a penny on the scale to Him, but it means so much to Him.  I wrote down all the events that has happened this past month in hopes that I can look back on them periodically to remember just how Great my GOD is.  It's seems to be so easy to forget the good things and dwell on the bad things.  We can be extremely thankful on minute for something grand God has done in our lives, but the next minute we are yelling at Him and asking why when something bad comes along, even if it's so small.  Fickle feelings is right.  It just reminds me how much a daily walk with God is so vital to our lives and emotional stability!

It's a good thing I realized that God doesn't fall off His throne in shock when I do tell Him what's on my mind! Man, if He did! I think I would die! (this is why what's in my mind stays between me and God) :) haha!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

"Dear Lord,"

Please be with me today as there is a table full of deserts close enough for me to smell them.

I'm am a child of God

I have all that I need

I'm am a child of God

I have all that I need

I'm am a child of God

I have all that I need

I'm am a child of God

I have all that I need

I'm am a child of God

I have all that I need


Recently a group of my friends decided to go Swing Dancing! It was so much fun! I loved it so much.  I ended up going back two days later! It was interesting to learn to follow though I must say.  I'm used to dancing on my own, but here you dance with a partner.  Learning to listen to the meticulous gestures and moves that let you know what you are supposed to do next is no easy task! I'm getting there though!

I can't wait to go back again and I highly suggest it to everyone! It's a great way to get out there and be sociable and most of all, just have FUN!!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Very Unusual

It's been very weird lately, even though I have had so much going on, I have not had the urge to write on single bit on this blog.  VERY unusual.  Usually I am sitting so here so anxious to write about things,  but now, I just don't want to.  I haven't even touched my diary in a few weeks either.  Hmmmm... I hope this is just a phase!! I really should write something though... Oh wait! I just did! YAY!!!

Fast Forward 3 Years!

Wait... Is it really you? Yes, my friends and followers. It is me. I am back.  I have been continually reminded about my blog I used to upda...