Thursday, October 28, 2010

Does She Know?

My heart is hurting for all those girls out there who don't know, who don't know they are loved and valueable.  I look at some and I can just see the pain in their eyes.  God gave me this song when I was struggling with the same thing myself.  I would love for you to hear the lyrics. 

Does She Know
By: Kelley Welu

~Verse 1~
She‘s standing there, all alone
The pain in her eyes, a story untold
Deep inside, she is breaking
Deep inside, she’s crying out
For someone, anyone

Does she know how much she is loved
Does she see her worth?
Does she realize, Oh I wish she would see
She is treasured by the King
Does she know? She is loved.

~Verse 2~
She tries so very hard
But she’s tired of this fa├žade
She wants to be happy
She wants to be somebody else
But she can’t, she just can’t


She wants to, she wants to be free
Oh! She wants to, she wants to be free!
(Repeat 1x)

Does she know how much she is loved
Does she see her worth?
Does she realize, Oh I wish she would see
She is treasured by the King
The King of Kings, Does she know? She is loved.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Relentless Faith

I've been hearing a lot about faith recently and I am finding that it is not a coincidence.  It all started a couple weeks ago when Pastor Andrew preached on Sunday.  I'm not sure I remember all that he preached, but one thing I still have not gotten over was when he said, "I don't believe God answers prayers, I really don't.  I believe God answers FAITH." I have not been able to forget that for some reason.  It wasn't until later that I figured out why.  Faith has also made it's way upon countless conversations as well, leaving me no choice not to forget about it. 

One day, I met with my accountability partner and she said it to me straight (straight from God), I was having a hard time trying to figure out why I'm still dealing with my eating disorder and why it was so hard for me to give up.  She told me, "Kelley, you are dooming yourself to failure because every time you start something you already know you are going to fail.  You have no faith you are going to get out of this." I kind of pushed it aside at first, and automatically spitted out, "Yes I do!" After quick consideration, I realized I don't.  I've spent all my life with this eating disorder, 23 years at failing with this.  After countless of start up diets, I've already ingrained in my mind, I'm going to fail.  Sure, I'll lose some pounds.  Sure, I'll maybe even lose half a person in weight, but every time... I have gained it all back and more. 

I've realized why God has been putting faith in my daily conversations, and why what Pastor Andrew said has stuck with me.  I've been praying and praying and praying... praying and praying even more that I get freed from this.  Some days I've come to the point of just bawling my head of to God begging Him to make it all go away.  I've finally realized, sure I want freedom, but I'm not believing its going to happen.  After all, 23 years of never seeing it happen can do a lot to you.  But not today.  I am making a stand right now.  I choose to have FAITH I WILL GET OUT OF THIS. 

The bible stories all show, God healed someone when that person had faith that he/she would get healed.  Like the woman who had internal bleeding.  She had so much faith that she crawled through crowds of people just to touch... to touch the hem of His garment.  She knew within her heart of hearts that if she could just touch Him, she would be healed.  She never doubted for one second.  Not to mention the courage she had.  Back in those days, being sick was a social menace! No healthy person wanted to touch, be near you, or even make eye contact with you.  She had to go through all these people who were probably rejecting her right and left.  But... she knew she if she could just touch Him, she would be healed.  She did, she was healed.  Her faith healed her.  Even Jesus said that.  There are countless of stories of which God healed people who had faith. 

I also want to make note, praying is not bad.  Praying is a good thing! God hears your prayers and wants to listen to your concerns.  But sometimes, we just need to have a little bit more faith.   After all, we pray for miracles, but miracles are things that happen out of the ordinary.  Things we don't see everyday, things that go above and beyond our expectations.  That is precisely why we need faith! Faith is believing the unseen, and not just that, believing it will happen, not maybe it will happen. 

Boy, what a radical revelation! God is so amazing, isn't he?  Someday I WILL get out of this.  And man, have my eating habits changed since this started! I've noticed night and day differences.  GOD IS HERE! AND HE IS WORKING!!!!!! GLORY HALLELUJAH!

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Updates are Good Once in a While

So here's the 411.  I am doing well.  Working and chilaxing. Monday night Tutoring started up again so I am having a good time there.  My student from last year decided not to return. I was quite shocked as she told me all last year how she loved it and even her younger sister (who was too young yet for the program) wanted to come.  When the first tutoring session started last week, I met my new student.  Low and behold, she was my previous year's student's best friend! She even knew me, told her friend that I was her tutor this year and they drew me pictures! It was so sweet! I even got a little teary-eyed! And that's pretty unusual for me to get teary-eyed! I still have those pictures in my purse.  My new student also told me that the reason my other student didn't come back this year is because she is moving to California.  Ahh, now that makes sense.  Such a bum, I'm going to miss that little sweety! I was so excited to try out some new things with her this year but I am also excited to try out some of those things with my new student, who is an absolute doll by the way! She's already made room for herself in my heart!

Other things, my dear friend is now in Ghana doing the Lord's work! I miss her already but she's off doing bigger and better things! I'm so happy that she's there and fulfilling her dream! It's been a long and tiring road to get her there and she deserves this so much for her kind and faithful spirit.  It's so cool to also say I am good friends with a "missionary" :) hehehe!

Other than that, my job at American Family Insurance is going well. I sill love it and am enjoying working there.  Wish it was a permanent position but not everything can perfect, right? :)

My new car is running smoothly and I enjoy having such a beautiful blessing.  God really blessed me with that car.  I guess it just means He loves me! :D

One other side note, for all my friends out there, I still have a lot of free time and I really enjoy hanging out with people.  Don't be nervous to call me up and hang out!

One thing I am really excited for is Christmas.  It's only 2 1/2 months away and my family will FINALLY be able to be together again! Yes, it's true.  All four kids will be home for Christmas.  So we'll have Mom, dad, Melissa and Cory with their two wonderful and adorable kids, Ryan and Liesl with their amazing daughter Ryelie and even the newest one who hasn't come out yet.  He/she will be here by Christmas though! :) Then there's Nate and his wife Vanessa coming home as well.  Last but not least, then there's me! :) We have not been all together at the same time since my sister's wedding back in like 2006! So bear with me as my excitement boils as Christmas draws near! Of course, I'm also excited to celebrate Jesus's birth too! Can't forget the reason for the season!

I believe that is all the updates for now! Bye ya'all!

Fast Forward 3 Years!

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